11 years

How do you explain to a 4 year old where their "Pops" is and why he will never meet him? How do you explain cancer? What it is, what is does, who gets it?
How do you handle all those milestones in your children's lives knowing your father is missing out on all of them. Each of my boys' birthdays are hard, every holiday, and literally every milestone, whether it is walking, talking, playing sports, sleepovers, everything and anything they do my dad is in the back of my mind.
I'm constantly thinking about how our lives would be different, better, if he were here with us. Would he have put a pool in our childhood home for them? Added space for a playroom? How often would we go to Waco and let them spend the night? I know that my dad would have been an amazing, wonderful, fun, loving, giving grandfather. We would have called him "Pops" because he was just fun that way!
I remember when I was going off to college, moving to College Station, and how proud of me he was...even though I was going to Texas A&M! I was so scared to leave home because he had already been diagnosed, and I knew it wasn't good. He told me that he was going to live long enough to put green jello in my kids' hair. He of course did not live that long, and I can't tell you how many times I have thought of that conversation, and I just have to smile because I know he would have been that kind of "Pops"!
My boys will always be aware of him. They will always say "goodnight to Pops up in Heaven." We will celebrate his birthday with cupcakes. His memory will stay alive in my heart and in theirs. He truly was the best man I have and will ever know. No one will ever compare to the man he was. He left behind a legacy and I'm so proud that he was my Daddy. After 11 years, it is not easier on this day. Well, I guess I can't say that. I guess it is easier, I just stay very busy.
Don't tell me that he is in a better place and he is not in pain anymore. I know that, but I still want him here. I want him here. I want him healthy. I want him to know my kids, my niece, my husband, my sister in law. He has 2 grandsons, 1 granddaughter, and I'm sure more to come. They are all missing out on a wonderful man. It is sad. We deal with it. It is hard, but we deal with it.
So, on this day I ask you. Hug, call, email, text, whatever, your dads. Tell them you love them and are lucky to have them. I can't do that. I still want to pick up the phone and talk to him. I absolutely hate cancer and it makes me sick to think of all the families and lives this dreaded disease has destroyed. Where is the cure? Why haven't we found it? Please join the fight against cancer. Go to www.livestrong.com or www.standup2cancer.org if you wanna help.

1st day

The boys and I had our first day back to school yesterday. It was a good morning and overall a good day for both of them. We are very sad to say goodbye to summer but are looking forward to another great school year. Mommy has to save the world at work and that is the only reason I leave them.

How was your day?

Did you.....
wake up at 6:30 with a huge headache and sore throat along with two snotty, grumpy kids?!
Then after breakfast, had to go to HEB, but had 1 fit throwing 4 year old and a crying 1 year old because big brother was crying. Get to HEB, and guess what, we forgot Drew's shoes! I asked him to get them, but above the crying, I guess he didn't hear me! OK! No shoes. Turn around, go back home, grab shoes, head back to HEB. Get a car cart! YAY Mommy! well, today they decided to fight the whole time we were at the store. Not even kidding you. They do this car cart once a week and never has it been a problem, until today. Got all groceries in under an hour and headed back home. By the time we got home, Dylan was crying because he was just starving! Got lunch in the oven and unloaded car and put all the groceries away. After lunch, we were all happy again. SO I decided to BAKE! mini muffins and homemade chocolate chip cookies. Dylan took a nap while Drew and I baked. Then it was time for Drew and I to lay down. We fell asleep and Dylan woke up less than 1 hour later. So much for my nap!
Cooked dinner, played, Drew and Craig went to Round Rock Express game. Dylan and I stayed home and had some time together. He was asleep before 8pm.
Now, my house is quiet and I'm getting ready to leave for 3 days alone. After today, I feel like I deserve my girl's trip!
Next week is school again :(

The End is Near

Well folks, our summer is coming to an end way too quickly. I have been in my classroom just twice for a few hours each and it's looking good, but I still have a lot of work to do. The boys' backpacks are hung in the entryway. We have gone to Costco for "after school snacks and drinks". We have been waking up early to get used to the school days. Going to bed early really sucks since it's still light and technically still summer! We are going to live it up this week. Going to the pool everyday and having playdates. And going to some baseball games. Yay summer. We will miss you terribly.

Gymnastics

hanging...

Bear crawling on the parallel bars

forward rolls on the air track--his fave!

Drew asked to do gymnastics again this summer and I was more than happy to sign him up! He had a class on Fridays and every week after class we would meet Daddy for lunch at a place of Drew's choice! He did really well. I was super impressed with him. He had class full of girls! Only a few times would there by 1 or 2 other boys!
We are trying soccer in the fall and taking a break from gymnastics. That should be interesting! 4 year olds playing soccer....

sprinkler pad

So we got this little sprinkler pad when Drew was a little over a year old and it has been in the attic since that summer. until now! I got it down one day and after lunch we got in our swimsuits and headed to the backyard for some fun sprinkler time. Dylan had fun trying to catch the water! Drew was running around the backyard between this and his slides on his playscape. I sprayed his slides down and made "waterslides". I had to put the dogs in the house because 1. they were trying to catch the water with their mouths, and 2. it was making the yard muddy.


We have played in this sprinkler a few more times since this particular day. However, now that Dylan is walking, sitting in one spot playing just doesn't last very long these days! Anyone want this cool pad? You hook a waterhose to it and let it go! I know by next summer they will have no desire to play with this! I'm glad that I can give my boys these summer memories. More memories to come....

Anniversary Dinner

Yesterday, July 26th, was our 6th wedding anniversary. We went to dinner at Roy's and had a little piece of Hawaii here at least for dinner! We started with edamame and then had the best sushi I have ever eaten! Our entrees were amazing as well. When we arrived, there was a card from the staff on our table. Then we opened up our menus and there was a paper with a beautiful poem and it said "Happy 6th wedding anniversary Craig and Kelly" at the top!

We got the famous chocolate souffle for dessert (which takes 20 minutes to prepare!) that is hot and delicious. They wrote Happy Anniversary in chocolate on the plate and brought us champagne! It was just like being back in Maui where they treat you right! It was hard for me not to talk about going back to Hawaii! Especially with the Hawaiian music and cocktails! We had a fabulous time and everytime we do something like this we always say we need more date nights! Now, finding the time is the problem!

Happy Anniversary Craig! My best friend, my true love, my soulmate. I love you! Always and Forever!